5 FACTS ABOUT LIFE.
1) No matter how handsome & attractive you are, just remember that baboons and gorillas also attract tourists.
2) No matter how light skinned you are, you always need a light in the dark.
3) No matter how tall you are, you can never see tomorrow.
4) No matter how many cars you own, you'll still have to walk to the toilet.
5) No matter how big and strong you are, you cannot carry yourself to the grave......
So take it easy....
Life is short..
Retired Husband
RETIRED HUSBAND After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - loves to browse & leaves me with endless time to fulfill. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local Wal-Mart Dear Mrs. Harris: Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras: 1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's ...